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Posts by lostdad

I'm a lost dad - A survivor. For years I have had to witness the continuing alienation of my boys from me. Several visits to court tried to stop the situation but in the end my own boys believed everything they heard at home and refused to see me any more. Parental alienation exists, is real and is abuse - both for the children and the non-residental parent.
by lostdad

An Open Letter to Cafcass

A very thoughtful post here detailing the effects of parental alienation, and how (in the poster’s case) CAFCASS are not willing to help even though they acknowledge the problem exists, and who the instigator is.

This mirrors my case here in Germany quite closely, and social services Thinking of the children’s wellbeing, support the status quo, because anything else will ‘harm’ the children in their view.

Unfortunately, in all of these cases the harm has been done, and will be exacerbated in the future when the children become adults and realise what has happened.

 

Dear Cafcass, At time of writing I have not seen my three beautiful children for nine and a half months. Since separating, my ex and I have spent in excess of £10,000 between us on legal fees. My aim is to co-parent, my ex’s aim is to keep me away from my children. Immediately after […]

via An Open Letter to Cafcass — Peace Not Pas

by lostdad

Tory MP calls for strict enforcement of child arrangement orders

Excellent news here in the UK parliament. A couple of weeks ago PA was debated, now we have a private member’s bill being put forward by an engaged tory MP  (and supported by several of her party) to change the law regarding enforcement of child arrangement orders.

Hopefully, it will get to the next stage. If not it is still raising awareness of the issue of PA and parents blocking access of the non-resident parent to the children.

via Tory MP calls for strict enforcement of child arrangement orders – We Are Fathers4Justice – The Official Campaign Organisation

by lostdad

A Letter from the Ministry of Justice, Now This Is Funny! (It shouldn’t be but it is)

Lee Azevado's avatarLee Serpa Azevado

I recently received a letter from the Minister of State for Justice. This being the result of an appointment at the office of my local MP earlier on in the year. My aim in approaching my local MP was to bring to her attention the injustice in battling parental alienation and seek her help and support.

The resultingletter from the Minister of Justicestarted with a misplaced attempt at reassurance byinforming me”the government recognises that decisions about child arrangements following divorce or separation can be difficult and distressing”. The letter then went on to say “no parent should prevent a child from spending meaningful time with the other parent.”The next farcical comment was “it is unacceptable for either parent to breach a court order.” However, in terms of entertainment value my favourite sentence in the whole letter was “Cafcass practitioners are aware of the potential for children to be influenced by…

View original post 330 more words

by lostdad

Briefly, what to do when Parental Alienation gets you

Nick Child's avatarthe alienation experience

Home page of Open Minds Foundation website

Welcome to the launch of the new Open Minds Foundation website!

And, first of all, could you please check and advise on this new very brief guide there:

WHAT TO DO ABOUT PARENTAL ALIENATION … as an excluded parent, as an alienated child, and as a by-stander.

The Open Minds Foundation is committed to tackling all kinds of harmful coercive persuasion – generally known as ‘undue influence’.

There, we have worked on how to include the patterns of family coercion: coercive control in domestic violence, child abuse and parental alienation.

The alienation experience is a key part of harmful coercive persuasion in every kind of family and non-family situations. To be harmfully coerced you need to be cut off from outside information and healthy relationships. In a word that’s: Alienation.

But there’s only the one specific pattern commonly named to include the word ‘alienation’. And that’s: Parental Alienation.

Here’s the sub-headings in that guide on what to do…

View original post 91 more words

by lostdad

Entfremdung – wikipedia

admin Familie Familienrecht- family law austria germany's avatarFamilie & Familienrecht

Entfremdung

Entfremdung bezeichnet einen individuellen oder gesellschaftlichen Zustand, in dem eine ursprünglich natürliche Beziehung (zwischen Menschen, Menschen und Arbeit, Menschen und dem Produkt ihrer Arbeit sowie von Menschen zu sich selbst) aufgehoben, verkehrt, ge- oder zerstört wird.

Der Begriff geht auf die lateinischen Wörter alienatio (Entfremdung, Entäußerung, das Weggeben einer Sache in fremden Besitz, Abfall) und alienare (veräußern, entfremden, entzweien, in fremde Gewalt bringen, in fremde Hände geben) zurück, womit die klassische bürgerliche englische politische Ökonomie die “Veräußerung” eines Gegenstandes, der dadurch seinem Produzenten “entfremdet” wird, und die naturrechtlichen Theorien vom Gesellschaftsvertrag des 18. Jahrhunderts die “Übertragung” (Die Veräußerung, den “Verlust”) der ursprünglichen Freiheit an eine dem Individuum fremd gegenüberstehende Macht (Gesellschaft, Herrscher) bezeichnen.[1][2]

Inhaltsverzeichnis

Begriff

  1. „Entfremdung“ ist der gesellschaftlich vorangetriebene und unumkehrbare Prozess

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by lostdad

Wechselmodell – Erfahrungsbericht

Shared Parenting can work …

admin Familie Familienrecht- family law austria germany's avatarFamilie & Familienrecht

Wechselmodell – Es kann gut laufen

Wenn sich ein Paar scheiden lässt, stellt sich die Frage, wer die Kinder betreut. Das sogenannte Wechselmodell wird in Deutschland noch gerne verteufelt. Eine Leserin und ein Leser berichten von ihren positiven Erfahrungen damit.

 

(Foto: Andreas Gebert/dpa)“Fliegender Wechsel” vom 17. März und “Verordnen hilft da nicht” vom 9. März:

Dass die deutschen Familiengerichte nun endlich mehr das sogenannte Wechselmodell unterstützen, ist eine große Errungenschaft. Selbstverständlich ergibt dies nur Sinn, wenn Vater und Mutter beide ihre Kinder aufnehmen möchten, denn Kinder einem Elternteil “aufzudrücken”, ist kaum wünschenswert. Dank des Wechselmodells sind beide Elternteile gleichberechtigt und verpflichtet, und das ist gut so. Selbstredend sollten damit auch Unterhaltsverpflichtungen unter den Ehegatten – nach einer kurzen Übergangszeit zur möglicherweise erforderlichen beruflichen Neuorientierung – ausgeschlossen und Unterhaltsverpflichtungen für die Kinder paritätisch übernommen werden.

Meine Ex-Ehefrau und ich praktizieren das Wechselmodell seit mehr als zehn Jahren problemlos und im…

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by lostdad

The second summer

In the first half of 2010 nothing really serious happened. Interestingly enough we both petitioned for divorce on the same day! Her petition arriving a few hours before mine, so she “won”! it went on to take a year to finalise due to sorting out the one mandatory item in a German divorce – no not custody of the children as one would expect – but pension rights.

She proved to be a lot sneakier than last summer. But again – anything to stop the children staying with me for more than a couple of days.

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